watched two films yesterday- rabbit hole with the fabulous Nicole kidman and The Lamp with actors i didn't recognise. both films were about death and grief and i suppose recovery. the first was really good, Nicole kidman's portrayal of a grieving mother was excellent. the second film was not so well acted although the male lead carried the film with his passionate portrayal of angry and hurt grief.
anyway i haven't the bother to say much more. but this morning i woke up and realised how tightly bound i am to my past. the rope is so strong it strangles me. i have i think inadvertently tried to loosen it over the years and have, perhaps clumsily, attempted to saw away at the rope but have only loosened a few threads. I think this is what strangles me. It is perhaps being bound to an invisible set of rules and expectations which has led me to the particular mind set and life in which I now inhabit.
I welcome the big strong scissors to cut through this rope.
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